About Me

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Cherry L. is a dessert junkie and self-proclaimed psycho genius dreaming of world domination while creatively avoiding scandals. When not engaged in social interactions, she subconsciously slips off into a parallel universe. Easily distracted by pretty boys and strange objects. Her demonic kiasu-ness and notorious procrastination are genetic.

Friday, February 6, 2009

Gloomy Afternoon

It's lunch period. I'm having the cramps. But my recent moodiness had nothing to do with PMS (maybe just a little). God, help me survive through this month of February! Waiting for my next pay to come in. Fufufu. This reminds me of the time I was working here in 06'. When I just tried to do things to fill up my time and mind and hope time will pass eventually leading to a 'better day' (God knows what the bleep I'm actually waiting for).

My biggest fear of life is boredom and absolute incompetence. I am always worrying what if I had nothing to do, nothing to think about and blah. Or else, what if I don't do my part to contribute to the society? I also dread the day God will hold me accountable on how well I lived my life; whether I was a good human and did live with dignity. I must admit that the accounts are rather messy right now. Someone tell me I'm worrying unnecessarily and I should just stop self pitying myself and start appreciating everything I have now.

Just a few silly minutes ago, I discovered a new sub category for our existing collections of 'Gurauan' (meaning 'Humour'/'Jokes') If anyone has followed Shin Chan obsessively, they would recollect hearing the Gurauan Itali (which utterly makes no sense except the fact that it involves spaghetti used in the most bizarre manner). So eventually, Xian and I came up with other versions of Gurauan (incl. Gurauan India, Gurauan Malaysia, Gurauan Jepun etc.)

So within this week, my mum came up with a few statements that would fall under the category of 'Gurauan Orang Kaya' (which would also later lead to the discovery of 'Gurauan Orang Miskin'). Simply put, if anyone who has followed the anime Ouran High School Host Club will automatically identify what falls within 'Gurauan Orang Kaya' ie. jokes that 'commoners' will not find flattering / indirectly offensive / making no sense at all, while at the same time highlight the extraordinariness of being rich.

From yesterday's example:-

Me: Mum, we have a matchmaking request from my high school friend. She has a female poodle the same breed as Larry*. Considering the fact that you are constantly showing signs of wanting to have grandchildren recently, it seems that the youngest among us siblings (mum calls Larry her 'son') is able to fulfil your wish. Btw, her name is Suki and is Larry's age. Since they're both poodles, I think it's a good idea to let them breed.

*If you haven't known, Larry is my mother's precious poodle that I think she loves more than me.

Mum: (muka totally uninterested) Aiya, Larry's a virgin you know... (I read her mind and I heard, "So cannot just simply offer his precious virginity to some commoner poodle and have his heirs to our family's empire.") What if we bred Larry and Husky? The puppy would be a Poo-sky / Poo-ky! (Gurauan Anjing, which is the current trend among the tai-tai's of our family who constantly like to brag about their dogs.)

Me: Mother, what a horrible and vulgar combination for a name. Even for some miraculous way they manage to mate (in consideration of their vast difference in size), I don't dare to imagine what monster will come out.

Me: Oh and Ryan's got a new puppy. I think it's a Shih Tzu. Her name is Kim Chee and is very cute and playful.

Mum: (muka air liur meleleh) Oh so then they can give birth to a Shih-Poo / Poo-Shih. *syiok sendiri*

Me: Why are you so excited to become in laws with Auntie Jennifer? Just now you just totally ignored my first suggestion. Why you pei si other people's dog's background, not good enough for your dog izit?

Mum: (more air liur meleleh dan ketawa perempuan tamak) Your pa's favourite conditions ma, "Chuk Mun Dui Chuk Mun".*

*(literally meaning Bamboo door facing Bamboo door, it says that the bride and groom's family must be of equal standing. The opposite version would be "Muk Mun Dui Muk Mun" (Wooden Door facing Wooden Door) Bamboo was considered to be more exquisite and expensive than wood, therefore rich people will often have bamboo made doors.)

...if it's applicable to the dog, how much more strict the conditions would be on me and my siblings.

There, one of the most recent Gurauan Orang Kaya. Not everyone will know how to appreciate it (because it happens often to our Shin Chan jokes). And if you feel that it amuses you, I would be inclined to submit a daily dose of the amusements of the rich people on occassion.


1 comment:

Olivia Jo said...

haIIIIII. ni problem i have to face every single fucking day.

I am prepared to be returned torned.