About Me

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Cherry L. is a dessert junkie and self-proclaimed psycho genius dreaming of world domination while creatively avoiding scandals. When not engaged in social interactions, she subconsciously slips off into a parallel universe. Easily distracted by pretty boys and strange objects. Her demonic kiasu-ness and notorious procrastination are genetic.

Saturday, May 30, 2009

Weekends Are Meant To Be Lazed Away

I am hopeful for a Lesleh sighting this weekend. Her appearance is so totally random and unpredictable, I have to walk up and down the house to kill the time of waiting for her phone call.

My sis and I were online till 5 in the morning. Huahahahaha. I got my first job change after 3 weeks. I juggle my time between work, playing Maple, berchiko-ing with my chiko peeps, watching Korean variety shows and concerts on Youtube every non-working/sleeping hour of my days. I'm unconvinced that the clubbing scene in Ipoh is even existent. I have passed by bars, which are patroned by middle aged chikopeks... The thought of it excites me to sleep. I can't even drink, unless comeone remembers to bring 2 wheelbarrows along; one to carry me home and the other to transport my puke.

We lack proper dessert houses where we can sit for hours chatting. I have A second ago I told my sister that when we were in KL, we could go out anytime for ice cream, parfaits, waffles, pancakes, tong sui and whatever sugary/carbohydrate charged snacks that would boost up our happy hormones. Our fridge was always stocked with pistachio ice cream and cornflakes...

Thursday, May 28, 2009

Change Is Challenging!

Ah... Been having the most challenging week of working of the year. Made some mistakes in January (which at that time I was a total ignorant noob at work) which are causing me mega chaos this month. I'm reaping the stuff I sow. I claim that I'm old enough not to be discouraged by the odds against me in life. After all, mistakes are all part of the learning process to become a more competent person. My boss has been unpleased with me recently, but considering the fact that he placed me in between 2 very experienced people and personally asked them to guide me says a lot. I don't wish to disappoint him again.

Oh yes, the layout and them has changed. The reason being my blog being bright and hot pink previously has the potential to attract a lot of attention when I'm on it in the office. Seemingly, people are not as dumb as you assume. They have eyes which wander. And unfortunately, I do not own Neji's Byakugan (can see what's going on 358° and spot hidden enemies). So at least now it's white with plenty of wording it (looks more like a word document) doesn't seem as too obvious and attract attention being glaringly hot pink.

I have a reason to believe that my current CPU is installed with an anti-web messenger software. It rejects everything from Live Messenger to Web Messenger and not even the browser for MSN/e-buddy works. It won't even run the installation download. Catastrophical. There goes my social life...

Si Lesleh is coming to Ipoh this Saturday. You make sure you call meh, woman.

The Surprise Gift For The Firm

Today, the boss gave everyone in the firm a big surprise gift. I believe he had this in mind for a long while, but was stalled due to the financial and practicality complications of it. Eventually, I think he was fully convinced that the staff performance needed to be boosted and it would be a beneficial investment to be made.

The gift was subject to much attention and excitement for the entire day. Staff members were encoraged to put it into constant use and not to be shy to utilize it because it was specially purchased for us. From today onwards, I am certain that everyone would be more enthusiastic to put more effort into coming to work every morning being highly inspired by the boss's well-meaning and generosity.

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My boss had a punch card machine installed.

Been A While Since I Did A Tag

Did this because it met my chiko standards and made me laugh.

1. Besides your lips, where is the favorite spot to get kissed? -Forehead. Cuz I feel loved when it doesn't seem sexual.

2. How did you feel when you woke up this morning? -Like I wanted to hack someone to death.

3. Who was the last person/people you took a photo with? - My dogs! Seriously.


4. Would you consider yourself spoiled? -More than an average person, yes. But not to the point I became a brat.

5. Will you ever donate blood? -I would. Unfortunately, I need blood to be donated to.

6. Have you ever had a best friend who was of the opposite sex? -YESH. I had a few, Ryan-kun is the only one remaining till today.

7. Do you want someone to be dead? -I don't care about my enemies.

8.What does your last text message say? -Haha happy birthday yan choon. Love kacheh.

9.What are u thinking right now? -Buying over a business, how to get rich, my own crib, how to finance it.

10. Do you want someone to be with you now? -Jo lor. Malat lor. Siwon lor.

11. What was the time you went to bed last night? -5 am. Accident.

12. Where did you buy the tee you are wearing now? -I stole it from my sister.

13. Is someone on your mind right now? -Only Siwon (pun intended; that's the url to his website).

14. Who was the last person who texted you? -Abi

TEN Lucky People to do this quiz.
1. Babi (Double Tag)
2. Duck
3. Jo
4. GSY
5. Lesleh
6. Whummy
7. Nama kau Ben
8. Ryan kun-if you're bored enough
9. Choi Siwon XD
10. Random TOA classmate

15. Who is no.2 having a relationship with? -Babi and some other kelefers. Me, on occasion.

16. Is no. 3 a male or a female? -Woman; her boobies are the real thang.

17. If no.7 and no.1 get together, would it be a good? -Kenot. I will never approve. How can my son date my sister? Ciz.

18. What is no.1 studying about? -Accounts yang paling dibenci.

19. When was the last time you chatted with them?
1. Babi (Double Tag) - Just Now
2. Duck - Yesterday
3. Jo - Tried to today but caught each other at wrong moments
4. GSY - Few days ago
5. Lesleh - FB today
6. Whummy - Ages
7. Nama kau Ben - Somewhere this year
8. Ryan kun - Just now
9. Choi Siwon - Never. Hopefully, someday.
10. Random TOA classmate - 1/2 year!!!

20. Is no. 4 single? -GSY, ru single? Using my blog to promote you. Haha.

21. Say something about no.2. -Hungrylah, Duck. ZZZ.

22. What do you think about no. 2 and no. 6 being together? -Super fun lor since both are chiko-able people.

23. Describe no.9. -The love of my life.

24. What will you do if no.6 and no.7 fight? -Ben will confirm die lor.

25. Do you like no.8? -Yala, he's my BFF, man.

Wednesday, May 27, 2009

Don't Rely On Other People For Your Life Decisions

I'm really giving up. It's tiring and confusing if you allow too many voices to get up your brain. You care, you get involved, feelings are invested, time wasted in the end because ultimately in the end, people are indeed the master of their own fate.

If you're determined to let people see you as a victim, YOU ARE A VICTIM. You can give excuses till the day you die and still be the victim and nothing would have changed. If you want to to continue the sweet dream of people reassuring your role as the victim, how everyone else are villains and how unfortunate you've been mistreated and restricted by everything in the world, go ahead and live in that sweet insanity. You deny. I back off. If people who say realistic things to you are enemies, better just ignore them and continue living you life as you wish.

I don't have a damn right to change you but I care enough. I'm not perfect, but I made enough mistakes to know what works and what doesn't.

Just something to ponder about-

Why do you think I'm studying investments and business on the side? Why am I so tight with my money that I am willing to eat microwaved food (even though cancer is my biggest fear) everyday to stinge on a few dollars a day? Why am I learning real estate and surveying the property market in Malaysia and learning all I can from a conveyancing firm that I swore that office life sitting in front of a computer for 8 hours everyday would be the end of me?

Why am I doing all the things I believed I hated?

Very simply because of the dream of the successful restaurant decorated with my art and moving out of this hellhole once and for all. Not just any dream, but a joint dream.

"Nobody asked you to do it in the first place."

True. Nobody asked.

I don't deserve this kind of gratefulness and appreciation. In fact, I didn't expect any. It is unfair, unreasonable, mean and immature to say such words.

I can tell you very honestly, I love my siblings. But if they grew up to be losers, I will have nothing to do with them. Because when I try to help them I would think, "Nobody asked."

Their sister can only look after them so much and she has her own life to live, even if it means opening her art gallery solo.

Maybe you don't mean the things you said and maybe I misunderstood certain things. I was more wtfbbq than hurt. 'Hurt' is an overused word in this house. I don't have that much of a 'care' capacity to take every word as an offense. I don't give a shit about drama and petty mind games either. It's overrated, wastes my time and I wanna wake up going to work happy.

I also want to take this opportunity to say while you insist for people to listen attentively to you and sympathize, you do the same for me by changing subjects, ignoring me or snapping at me 95% of the time. Yes you talk crap, you don't mean it, joking, not thinking straight, whatever. At least, choose a better time when we're mutually in a chiko-ing mood.

About being sensitive. I care as much about the issue as if it were my own problem. We are standing on the same side facing the problem. The problem is the enemy and I am attacking the problem. But you jump in to 'protect' the problem and take the damage and assume I was attacking you.

About being defensive. I am defending us both, but you yourself ran to the enemy side and got hit on its behalf again.

Do you now see what went wrong from a heart to heart talk to some wtfbbq fight?

I won't justify myself for hurting you. I never intended it in a mean way to demoralize you or make you feel stupid, useless and unheard. It was a failure on my part.

I respect enough that your life is your own responsibility and your timing is yours.

Tuesday, May 26, 2009

My Phone Is Biased

Lunch break. Am listening through earphones. It plays all other songs alright but only plays SuJu songs properly when I tilt my head 45 degrees to the right. I'm going to suffer from neck pain this evening... I prophesy accurately what plays on Mix FM everyday now.

My updated wishlist for my birthday: New Sony Ericsson earphones. ;D

Recently, I've been drunk between SuJu and Mapling. The SuJu addiction is worst because the following has happened:-

1. Watching MVs obsessively and forgetting reload my phone before 12 am resulting the number getting barred and balance forfeited.

2. In many events forgetting the existense of my phone and missing appointment with friends.

3. Borrowing a DVD from my granpa which has 20++ Andy Lau movies in it just because Siwon has a cameo in one of the movies; 'The Battle of Wits'.

4. Today, I nearly typed in the name Choi Siwon into my loan document. I can imagine my LA who checks my documents ask me prior to sending it to the bank, "Who is Choi Siwon? Is he a named party to the agreement?" *refers frantically to official bank documents*

Choi Siwon


If only we had clients as hot as Siwon walking into our firm everyday.

*I'm choking on laughter while typing this*

There were 2 instances where I accidentally typed in names of people I knew personally into my loan documents. One of them had her name same as my LA, but different surname. My LA was like wtfbbq.

End of lunch hour.

Sunday, May 24, 2009

Heaty Weekend

Firstly, OMG!!!!! My ex-HOP is on FB. Will definitely not add him because he would have unlimited access to my gambar paling kurang siuman... Definitely detrimental.

I slept 14 hours; Saturday night (10pm)~Sunday noon (12pm). It's like a weeks worth of sleep, been sleeping at 1-2 every night (reason: hardcore gaming beginning after dinner). Playing games somehow makes a person more easily irritated; I've been cussing and screaming a lot this entire week at minor annoyances and interruptions. Tonight, I moved my laptop into my bedroom.

The ultimate con of staying with your parents is restricted freedom. There's a curfew to everything; outings, Internet, shopping, visiting friends etc. Parents have the need to pass a comment on everything you do; how u walk, talk, sleep, eat, spend, drive etc. Nothing you do is right in their eyes. They just have the OCD to win every occasion.

Me, being the awful passive aggressive I am, will grasp any available opportunity to piss them off, make snarky remarks on their bad behavior and when possible try to convince relatives to my side. I suppose that's how we maintain leverage. When you're living in Ipoh plus there's a severe lack of entertainment, all there's left to do is to create drama yourself.

Visited Po today (haven't seen her for ages). Gong is good to talk to, and we kinda thought that we should be spending more time around in Ipoh since our grandparents are really old (even though Gong can walk faster than a teenager) even though sometimes our parents piss the crap out of us everyday.

OMG it's 4 and it's off to work tomorrow. I don't mind working, but then... I'd love my work to start at 10am instead. Anytime before 9:30am is like exposing a vampire into the sun. Good night.

Friday, May 22, 2009

It's My Bro's Bday!

My collegues are sharp... very sharp. By the end of the week of the relocation my seat, the ones sitting next to me are aware that I have internet access (somehow) without me making an official announcement. I never meant to be obcure about it, since we do ultilise the Internet to operate our cases.

By Thursday, I have been requested for online favours ranging from checking firm emails or legal websites, downloading documents to finding out the results of American Idol, whereby I discovered that the majority are Kris Allen supporters. I listened to Kris's Heartless cover on the radio and I thought it was really hot. (Geez I sound so Paris. As in Hilton.)

BUT it is a little creepy that people watch you silently and are aware of what's going on your monitor screen without your realization...

Mum is throwing a birthday tea/dinner party for my brother tomorrow evening. (Actual birthday is next Wednesday) Mum is ultilizing her summer house to its full social potential. She had an air conditioner installed in there recently. (All we need left is a fountain, carp and garden lights...) Heard that we're expecting around 60 people or more attending the event.

I saw the menu from the caterer (First Coffee Shop) and it looks seriously good. Sneak preview of the few I remember: fried chicken, beef rendang, nuggets, fries, sausages, prawn fritters, chicken curry, fried noodles, fruits, orange juice. We're trying to get a 2kg Mango Mousse Cake and balloons tonight. An aunt is contributing Tiramisu. *prepares to swim in food*

Wednesday, May 20, 2009

Blogging At Midnight

The most exciting thing that happened to me this week was moving to a new desk downstairs amongst the masses. The boss discovered me FB-ing and blogging instead of following my cases diligently and decided to demote me.

Impossible.

We actually discussed this over and realized that it would be best if I had a mentor at my side to guide me through my cases so that they can trust me with more cases. I must admit that I'm learning more than expected even just within these 3 days (ie. how to handle difficult clients/bank officers in style, how to play around deadlines, escape penalties and gory details of the financial health of banks/companies). Ms. Leong beside me is my great helpline.

No longer there are the days of me blogging and FB-ing on impulse during noon. I know I'll be missed. I discovered that the PC I am currently using was the same one I used when I was working in the firm 3 years ago (2005). How? Because it still contained all those anime wallpapers I uploaded. (:P) Fortunately, I am still able to go online (and prolly check on FB in the split seconds heads are turned) but unfortunately, the processor is one of >7 years ago and it is not able to support MSN (oh the horror).

The best news I heard today. Malat is returning in exactly a month's time. All this while I believed that I had to hold up till the end of July (June and July both start with 'J', that's why I got so mixed up) and we have tonnes of activities lined up for the entire month. OMG I'm so looking forward to our photo, food, beach, chiko-ing sessions. Waiting time just got cut short by 1 month.

The level of entertainment is not worth mentioning if compared to KL. It's not so bad because we're fun people who have fun anywhere, anytime. Last week, I even had this crazy idea of opening a decent club in Ipoh like Zouk. I don't think there is even a club in Ipoh that lives up to the qualifications of a club in Ipoh. Like, seriously.

The few interesting things to do when you're bored is eat, get on the net, watch a movie, shop a lil bit or sleep. That's all. Period. Howsoever, I think that Ipoh has the best cyber cafes in the country, correct me if you think otherwise. CCs in Ipoh get the best business because rent is cheap (big, famous ones own like 3 shoplots) and are very well equiped. Rate is cheapest in the country 1.00-2.50/hour but you get 3 lots worth of customers everyday. Profit up your neck sia.

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Over the weekend, when it was scorching hot, Husky's fan broke down and my mum purposely carried a fan over and placed it next to the door. We even threw her a few pieces of ice to munch. The next day, mum got her a huge metal fan (you know the huge ones that can go full blast, mebbe we can borrow it for our photoshoots LOL).


The two rascals.


Jack looks a bit like Mickey Mouse when both his ears are flipped, doesn't he?


His emoness who is afraid of the dark.


Thursday, May 14, 2009

The Day Lunch Is Dead

Gawd, I seriously couldn't wake up this morning. Was really close to throwing a temper tantrum against the torture of getting out of bed. Steph, Ryan and I went out to play Left 4 Dead and DotA. I must be growing old since I play like a total n00b. My glorious gaming days has become a memory of a distant past. So sad; what about the collection of games that I intend to play after I retire and all my kids left home? Gaming is fun, just that I'm not as obsessed about it as I was before college days.

Despite making plans yesterday, I have been left to fend for myself for lunchtime today. It's okay, I feel like eating the nice chicken rice 2 shops away but I discovered that it was closed. The vegetarian rice shop at the other end wasn't opened too. (Why is everything closed today?!) Being sleepy, tired and cranky to walk any further than 20 meters for food, I decided to make a cup of coffee and take a nap to sleep off my hunger...

Wednesday, May 13, 2009

I Oh So Hate The 39%*

With referral to this post.

You've hurt me so badly yet you keep me around for cheap favours.

If I have any better sense and dignity, I really should just ignore you.

F*.

*39% : are polite but mentally decides not to pursue anything beyond friendship. At least, if they happen to get in trouble with the law maybe I'll be willing to handle their case for free / give them a special discount (because we're friends!!!). Hey smartass, why would I want to associate myself with someone who purposely gets in trouble with the Law and thinks my service is not worth the remuneration?!

[Update]

On my judgment of character, I often relied on my initial gut feeling when associating with people. I take pride in my ability to decide whether this person is a potential friend or a subject to eternal banishment within the span of 3 seconds from first contact. Usually, it turns out accurate.

Sometimes I would feel uncomfortable associating with certain people; the kinda feeling that you decide to dislike them despite only knowing them for barely 2 minutes. I can't describe the reasons they are bad, but I just know it.

I used to know this guy; first impression I disliked intensely him without reason. We became good friends being the mild natured person I am. Eventually as I got to know him, I decided that he was too tedious to be friends with (and I'm glad he's not directly involved in my life as of today). A few other examples followed throughout the years, and I learnt that yes, my gut feeling is something NEVER to be disputed with.

In a logical sense, I expect the best from people and give them the benefit of the doubt. I cannot imagine people being evil and hurting another human being blatantly for their own gains. Realistically, they do. I have probably done it unconsciously every now and then. But for them to act without guilt and shame after doing despicable things is something that is utterly... out of my understanding.

Regret isn't something I'm familiar with, partially because I take extra effort to avoid any potential regrets after I made my decisions, not that I've always made the perfect choices. I only realized that I am only capable of making decisions that seem 'perfect' at that time. It contributes that I'm so competent in sweeping problems under the rug and move on with life should things go horribly wrong (like Duck would say, "Whatever-lah. Who cares?").

When revealed just for the sake of reevaluation, I should be regretting not studying hard to get better grades during school days, not persistently chasing my dreams of being an artist, not figuring out what I want in life for the long term and the consequences of my indecision and lack of action, not being stronger in character, not slimming down and dressing up prettily when I was younger and not telling that boy I had a crush on that I liked him (and regretting now that I told him I liked him).

I suppose it is within my power to determine what regret does to me. To be crippled by it, or to grow from it. Regret incinerates your pride and ego, 100x the damage if you're a proud Leo, like me. Thank God I'm a Leo, because losing is unheard of.

Steamboat on Mother's Day

We had a successful BBQ and we had a successful steamboat party. What next? Conveyor belt sushi? We shall have Tommy and Milo acting as the conveyor belt (Shin Chan joke).

We had meatballs, fish, 4 types of noodles, mushrooms, eggs and plenty of veggies.


We threw all the food into that amazingly huge pot of soup which was boiled almost immediately with our induction plate. Remember the traditional gas option? Boiling time was cut to 1/4.


As usual, there was the adults table (with alcohol; Uncle Fee holds the bottle gleefully)...


...and the children's table (with orange juice).


The pot filled with goodness.


So good that everyone was fixated on what was inside the pot.


With much patience, I finally got to scoop food out of the pot. I <3 Yee Mee.


I overate as usual... because the food was so good.


We had cake.
My selection of mangoes were of 50% accuracy. (Next time should ask the mango lover to buy mangoes, you know who you are.)


I'm so colour coordinated today.


The adults were so impressed with the technology of webcamming that everyone wanted to take turn to appear in front of the camera to wave to Xian.


When we took this picture, I asked Uncle Mike to include Xian in the shot so that he would at least have some involvement in tonight's event. He's gonna be tagged in FB as that fuzzy little green thing on the monitor beside me.


Meh & Hun Yee.


Bought flowers for all the mamas that night. I was lucky, apparently Ipoh has nearly run out of flowers.


Mama and her 4 kiddos. Yes, I said 4.


Monday, May 11, 2009

Drowsy

It's the crazy heat this morning! It's cloudy at the moment though. I'm so sleepy, I'm about to faint on my desk.

Yesterday was mama's day (How I'd wished every day was so). Had lunch at Citrus. Surprisingly, it wasn't jammed packed during lunch time which was a good thing.

Corn and Seafood Soup


Roasted Pumpkin (5 stars)


Mother's Day Special (Cod and Scallops)


Beef Aglio Olio and Grilled Chicken


Raspberry Crumble & Walnut Ice Cream


Tiramisu (Like a dream)


Strawberry Panna Cotta (<3)


Great coffee to down it all.


Later that evening, we had our immediate family members over to our house for steamboat. Ma and sis were fully responsible for shopping, slicing, making the stock (which has become legendary as of yesterday). As for me, since it was such a special occasion, I wasn't exactly being useless (as usual). I went around town (in my summery green dress, driving my sis's green Savvy, listening to SuJu in the hot sun) collecting the cake, flowers, buying mangoes (even though I was a noob in choosing the right ones) and plugged in the induction plate (and set it in such a way that the wire was barely noticeable and got praised for it).

More updates to come...

Friday, May 8, 2009

Reorganizing My Priorities (Once Again)

I'm so messed up right now, honestly. I suppose this is all in the process of growing up. Learning is a lifelong process. You're old enough to stand on your own feet and stand back up when people kick you to the ground. Pain is part of life. What doesn't kill you will only make you stronger. I need to grow up and grow up right now. I realize whenever I feel troubled, I take on more troubles and eventually get burnout by it.

No. 1, I observed that whatever I'm doing now is a desperate measure of turning my life upside down or right side up or wrong side down. There are the microseconds that I loose sight of what the hell I'm intending to do and start wondering what on earth was the initial purpose of me doing this?! I am a confused woman, seriously am. Like I wake up and realize that I'm on a strange, foreign planet.

I think the biggest issue is my insecurity; I'm afraid that if I tried to be too independent I would die in the middle of the street. I have never tried fending for myself, everything I eat, drink, wear and live off is from my parents. I'm afraid of failure, having to acknowledge that I am wrong and you were right from the very beginning. I'm probably not prone to suffering a less than perfect life. Hence, I half-heartedly try to break out from this vicious circle only to be sucked in again whenever I sense the slightest incoming defeat. I hath no courage. I play by defense.

Why the bleep am I such a perfectionist? I should strike for balance. My world is so limited. Here I am building my Tower of Babel. Maybe that's why God struck down my efforts and threw me onto the other side of the world. Why give me a talent and then make it impossible for me to fulfill my individual purpose? Why does my right wrist break down half a year of drawing and not 3 full years of writing? We, mere humans will know of nothing of the mysteries of the world.

The faith in my heart answers; wait upon God and all will be revealed once the time is right...

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Thank God for always leaving an avenue for brief escape for every challenge in life.

Occasionally, my heart feels like it is about to stop beating ("I feel like I'm going to die."), I find my instant resuscitation in Siwon.

"So handsome."
(Rosy (from Phua Chu Kang) slang)


Immediately my heart will start pumping again...

Thursday, May 7, 2009

Love Is A Battlefield

I don't give acknowledgment to the people and things I care about. I disattach myself intentionally from them because I don't want them to know how much influence they have over me. I leave them first driven by thoughts that I cannot stand to be abandoned or have outer factors tearing them away from me. I rather suffer the pain in silence than to let my weaknesses and vulnerabilities be known and risk being taken advantage of. I cover up my insecurities in order to seem self sufficient and capable. I suppress my emotions in order to feel in control. I am rude because I don't want to be seen as a pushover. I am cold and ruthless in my actions because I need to feel in control. I refuse to apologize to anyone protect my ego.

Everyone and everything is an enemy.

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That was my alter-ego speaking. I'm coming to realization that I am not a victim of fate but of my own accumulative defensive actions. I am my own worst enemy.

I LOVE. I love. Being the me I am to my friends who love and trust me in return. The reason I am still here today is because of the reaffirmation of my existence by love.

Being a Christian, I've decided that final answer should come from the holy texts.

"Love is patient, love is kind. It does not envy, it does not boast, it is not proud. It is not rude, it is not self-seeking, it is not easily angered, it keeps no record of wrongs. Love does not delight in evil but rejoices with the truth. It always protects, always trusts, always hopes, and always perseveres." ~1 Corinthians 13:4

There are the moments I do not want to love because it hurts me so much and it sometimes feels wrong to love. It is natural for me to love, but to what extent? If I were to limit my love to something that is 'reasonable' or 'logical', would it be still called love? If I were to condition that I will love only in guarantee that I will be loved back, I think I would have lost many friends along the way.

"And above all, have fervent love for one another: for love shall cover the multitude of sins."~Peter 4:8

I'm having this overdue heated debate in my mind.

Tuesday, May 5, 2009

First Impressions

I threw this question at my sister twice, after a long gap in time, "Let's say, you didn't know me, what would have been your first impression upon meeting me?" She answered, both times, "Lan si." (lit. arrogant)

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I mean, seriously?

Readers, I present to you the same question! Comment now!

Monday, May 4, 2009

Ryan kun

Not like you're ever gonna read this! Bwahahaha. But if you miraculously do, don't feel too embarassed because most of the stuff I wrote are plain facts and from my heart.

Ryan kun left for KL for training yesterday afternoon. I believe this may be your final exit out of Ipoh towards your dream. As your 'hou heng dai' (a.k.a. BFF; lit. good brother/partner) I feel really glad and proud that you're finally on track to pave the path for your future. Just half a year ago, both of us were like pathetic losers drowning hopelessly in the sea of life. You, in particular were so demotivated and complainy in every aspect of your life. Everyone thought your future was in serious question. You've grown into a man with purpose. Things are slowly falling in line for you. I'm really very relieved both of us managed to keep our chins up and pushed through that dark period.

I really meant it when I told you I thanked God you were around the past half a year because life became more bearable. My staunch belief is that every guy I have encountered in MHS is the spawn of darkness and destined to mess up my life one way or another. I even swore never to associate myself with one ever again, but you're the only exception. If I never met you, I would never had the chance to attend St Peter's and had my entire family christianed one by one. God has then blessed the family abundantly. I hope my family members would come to realize that.

You were the only friend who was physically there for me from the beginning of my dark ordeal till today. Whenever I fell into depression mode, you would force me to play Bioshock in order to freak the crap out of me (even though it was a really cruel and twisted way to ease my depression). Hence, the discovery of the benefits of 'Shock Theraphy'. You accompanied me jogging at a whim after work so that I could get fully charged with endorphins, drop dead tired and sleep soundly at the end of the day when you would rather play WoW with your precious leftover time.

You were always on call on MSN whenever I couldn't figure out my bizarre relationship problems and gave me really sound advice from the point of a guy. You visited me when I got paralyzed in bed from stomach ulcers prior to crying for days after breaking up. You smacked sense into me when I wanted to suffocate myself to death in a teacup being inspired by Goldie's recent suicide. You're always saying mean, insensitive things about my previous relationship, but I'll let it pass (coz I know that you're actually on my side).

October 14th last year, sis called from Ipoh at 2 in the morning to say they are going bring grandpa home because the doctors have given up on him. I was entering a nervous breakdown alone in my apartment in Puchong. I was already struggling with accumulated assignments due to my wrist surgery and the weekly trips back to Ipoh due to grandpa's on and off critical condition. I was on the verge of failing my semester by not meeting the attendance quota and delayed homework. If I didn't hear your calm voice over Skype that night, I think I would have snapped.

When my grandpa died, you were the only friend who attended his wake and let me wail my sorrows shamelessly when the world felt too heavy for my shoulders and my sister wasn't around. There was no space to cry nor to act weak when the family was consumed by the aspects of succeeding grandpa's legacy instead of consoling each other. You accommodated me when I just had to runaway from home for a brief moment to escape the madness past grandpa's death. I have never in my life cried so miserably and OOC in front of anyone before. I was glad that I was able to do so in return when your grandma passed away last weekend. (I would have never known that men's office pants were adjustable in length on purchase if I didn't accompany you shopping...)

I had to give up art because I wasn't physically, mentally and emotionally capable of persevering. I was incapable of facing the shock and the painful memories of having to give up art again and returning to law. I was completely defeated by fate and my heart was so shaken I thought I was about to break into pieces any second. You knocked sense into me when I was growing mad and talking rubbish. You assured me that no matter what, I can still draw as a hobby if not commercially.

Steph remarked that you're like my 'nai gung' (meaning male nanny) because I acted like a baby (vulnerable, helpless and crying) and you are on call to take care of me all the time. The baby has grown up now and is more 'powderful' than before thanks to your patient nurturing (developed through playing Maple Story, known for its excruciating process of levelling up).

Thank you for setting up my current wonderful office and getting injured in the process (My desk alone looks heavy). I will strive to work hard too for my future. Thank you for driving me around in 4477 (which I shamefully never managed to master driving before your dad sold it off) when my wrist went through hell from surgery. I think it's the most charming vehicle I've been in despite what you think about it.

I'll admit there were times I took you for granted with my bad habits (like being late all the time and not picking up my phone). Because of my aloofness and immaturity, I indirectly got you into a horrible accident and ruined your Easter weekend. I was totally ignorant about the whole thing and it dawned upon me that good friends are scarce and I can lose them any time. You still talked with me, forgave me and considered me a friend even after what I did.

So... I wish you success wherever you go (KL, Spore or Aussie) and believes that you will fulfil your hearts desire eventually. Blah it's not like we're not going to see each other again. *hates mushy good byes and conclusions*

Ipoh Traffic Evolving To KL Standards

I swear - the traffic in Ipoh is going to give me a heart attack on of these days. I almost crashed into a Camry today. It refused to slow down behind a stationary vehicle in its own lane and entered my lane without signal. Thank God for my heightened senses and skill (developed only through years of gaming experience). I swerved to the left, missing him by inches and almost hit another car on the next lane but I missed it by inches as well. What a moron. He totally ignored my existence and sped off even after his irresponsible deed.

I know this is absolutely gross but I have to quote what my sister exclaimed in the car:-

"F*king Camry, I got so frightened that I was going to die that my poop shot up my brain."

For somewhat reason, I can relate... Right now, I'm having a blasted migraine and my chest is still tight even an hour past the shock.

I detest people who own big, fancy cars (which are usually purchased on a loan) and act like barbarians on the road. If I crashed into anyone at that moment, let it be his. At least, he'll stop his car and get down rather than I crash into some other innocent person's car and both of us bear the burden of his selfishness.

So what happens if he turns hostile. People should know by now that I have weapons hidden all over my car. Plus, he has no idea the amount of legal background/underground at my disposal. Sis even has the 'kelefer mafia' on her speed dial.

Oh Jo-jo, hope you arrived in Spore safely. Don't accidentally eat your new colleagues. x

[Update]

Sis's poop is running normally now. Thank you for your concern.