Hatiku Terasa Masin Masam

It's gonna be August. One cycle is nearing it's end, another cycle is going to begin.

Mixed feelings. Must be the hormones acting today.

I was (considered) early to work today. As if I got traumatized by something. Muahaha. Am trying to get back into the habit.

Counting my blessings; my 1st BFF from S'pore is coming back for my bday. *so touched, everything else doesn't matter*, my 3rd BFF moved back to Ipoh this year, the family is together this year, celebrated pre-birthday in July twice with my beloved chikopeers, I get to see anak emas end of the month.

Resolution for the new year cycle:-

1. Even if I can't perform outstandingly in work, at least stay out of trouble and maintain my record relatively clean for the next few months.

2. Lose weight (again). The frequent midnight McValue double cheeseburgers, fries, coke, Tim Tams and Maggi Gorengs have sabotaged my waistline to a great extent. I have been cruel to be kind to myself.

3. Clean the room. Speaks for itself.

4. Sleep in time.

5. Recover my face.

6. Plan for December holildayze.

7. Take more photos and figure out how to upgrade my portfolio.

I Can Sing Like Louis Armstrong

Gomen ne, my chiko peers for losing my voice on K-night. It's like someone inserted a plank into my throat all the way to my lungs, it made me go all irritated in pain. I feel like scolding someone or something but I'm unable to. Argh. We shall go sing like nuts next Wednesday.

Chiko holiday; Malat, Babi, Duck and I are invading Penang this weekend. The theme of our tour is Eating Cendol Expedition to the North, where we will be stopping at every stop on our way to Penang to eat cendol (ie. Sitiawan, Taiping). Planning on getting a healthy tan, good food in my stomach, sand in my toes (and a Hokkien merman in my arms).

I applied for leave on Monday to go to KL for a day trip on a spur of a moment. Hopes to get prettier clothes for the year. (It's prolly time to look more like a hot bimbo than a burnout fugly librarian). Lesleh chooses to come to Ipoh the one weekend when I'm away. *pouts* And to Genting the day I'm in KL.

So hungry now.

So Far Away I Hide So That You Won't Be Able To Find Me

I hope to deviate away your attention, protect myself from your affection and disassociate my life from yours. Forget me as I forget you.

---

Sometimes I do wonder does a new hurt digs up a lot of underlying unresolved problems. My chest hurts but it surprises me when I realize that it is hurting for another person. Devastating. Suffocating.

I miss the days you made the effort to be always beside me. I blamed you for drifting and the reason I walked away was because I wanted to be able to stand by myself and not always have to rely on you to be happy. I didn't want to admit how important you were.

And I repeated the same mistake with someone else.

I hurt today. Partially, it's you.

Chiko Bdays

I'm last minute as usual. Sorreh!! So busy x busy with work. This week was prove all Mega B*s wrong and make them look bad in the process. I didn't even have time to update with my own sister even though we're living in the same house.

Tomorrow we will be celebrating Malat and I's "2+2 divided by 2 = 2" chiko average birthday. over delicious Korean BBQ. Belated for his, be-earlied for mine, somewhere in the middle. Duck is invited, even though I did not manage to ask her personally because we have lost contact in duck space, but you are welcome to party crash.

We will be trying the kinda new Korean BBQ restaurant since I want to have fun grilling pork slices on the grill, eat bibimbap and drink ice jasmine tea.