I Hath Net Access In Office

I no longer need to run over to the freezing accounts department to do bank online updating and bankruptcy searches.

Yes, I'm brroooggin' at work.

Think about all the other evils I can do from today...

(RO being in my pendrive next to me now... *evil snicker*)

Of course play must wait till lunch time. My work performance has been tripping at certain stages this week. Kai-Ma came into our office and was shocked to catch me with 'muka perempuan tension gila' today. My brain is also a bit jumbled up because my multitasking ability has found its match.

Our church has a food fair on the 20th of April (Monday) (also the Perak Sultan's birthday) so do come and give support (to me because I'm making coffee and my coffee is good).

My Blurness

It crossed my mind to get myself a personal assistant to keep track of my cases, see that I don't misplace my documents, do my photocopying, check my spelling mistakes, make sure that I don't look like a fashion disaster, get enough sleep and that I take my vitamins in time.

I forgot to bring my lunch to work despite packing it up so well this morning. Thank God, since my house is like only 3 minutes away, I asked my mum to drop by when she's about going out to town. At least now I manage to keep track of the bigger issues at the expense of forgetting the small details.

My Monday at work was a tad messed up, mostly because of my personal carelessness. I am trying my best to rectify things before the week ends and hopefully to set my good record straight again. I think I would be bringing out my Law books to read just so that I know as much as I should, having studying Law for 3 years. Well, at least this time I'm not studying for the sake of passing my exams but for leisure.

Work is really pushing me out of my comfort zone. For example, I really hate talking on the phone or talking to people (especially difficult people) but it's all part of the job to do so (and do so properly). Secondly, carelessness and procrastination being my first nature, a job with high responsibilities and severe penalties if I fail to meet expectations allows me to shed it off.

One habit which I find exceptionally difficult to break for the past quarter of my life is my utmost disregard for punctuality. I am well aware that this attitude will be the downfall of my otherwise near-perfect professional ethics. I suspect that the reason behind my unacceptable behavior runs deeper than the common logic of poor time management. In fact, I sense that it is driven by a unconscious psychological basis...

Being late gives me a rush. And I'm addicted to it. XD

Resolution 2009

1. I will stop peeling my face. I will stop peeling my face. I will stop peeling my face. I will stop harassing my blackheads/whiteheads and tearing off my scabs and any other form of breaking my skin on my face. I will treat my face with utmost respect and give it the most professional level of treatment it deserves. I will refrain from even touching it unless I'm washing it.

2. I will be frugal with my money and practice the belief of delayed gratification. The super wealthy become wealthy because they suffer first and enjoy the fruits of their labour in mass amounts. That is because they do not waste their potential capital on branded handbags, big cars and items which will give off the 'look' that they're rich.

Don't be fooled by appearances!

I've met people who own branded wallets but when they open them they only have a few ringgit inside. I've also met people who have money to eat birdnest (the blood type sommore) and abalone but no money to send their kids to school. And then they complain that they have no money and get jealous of the wealthy people and throw their dissatisfaction against every opposing factor in the universe but themselves.

Notice that the ones wearing polo shirts and khaki shorts are often the one who have the motherload. I heard of a dude who wore a straw hat, normal shirt, pants and rubber black boots who walked into a Ferrari showroom (and got peisi-ed by the salespeople there). He owns a agricultural empire in Asia. Dudes wearing branded costumes, Rolex watches, designer shoes (as in 24 hours a day)? Highly possible someone who is out to con your money or sell you to a whore house.

People laugh at the efforts of others who work harder than themselves because comforts their egos. The reason why the 10% of rich people are rich in this world is because they do not have the mindsets of the rest of the 90%. There are the stories of dirt poor uneducated people becoming rich, so it's not a matter of who's born rich and money suddenly appearing out of thin air (that's bullshit).

Okay, that was just from my perspective. Nobody is compelled to follow.

Being a girl who loves shopping just as much as any normal female, it is justified to own pretty things, and lots of them. Why, you might just die tomorrow and not be able to enjoy one of life's greatest joys. Fair? But unless daddy gave you 5 unlimited credit cards and you have a decent pay to support your own lifestlye, please be careful to not live beyond your means and end up with a life with debt. What I learnt from Jo; don't wear a hat that is too big for your head. You won't feel comfortable, you'll look like an idiot, you'll probably trip and die in the process.

The universal fact is, that if you want certain things bad enough, other things must take a back seat and you have to make huge sacrifices. The classic example:-

a) If you want to marry a rich dude, you must be carefully selective of the people you fall in love with. You might come to the point where you might need to sacrifice your one true love (who's poor, undereducated, pa and ma hates him to bits even though he's a lovely boy). Be prepared to fight your way through against all the girls (pretty/uglier/smarter/bitchier than you alike) who are all aiming at this instant ticket to wealth. And considering the supply of Prince Charmings is scarce and the global amount of Cinderellas (even the rich want to marry the rich). Rich dudes naturally can afford to have exquisite tastes and think they deserve it. Having to have sucessfully secured one, you'd need to commit your life into being super high maintenance on yourself in fear of the fact that there's always gonna be someone who might steal him away.

b) Vice versa, if you choose to marry middle class/poor dude instead, be prepared to live your life humbly without all the fame, status (and the high class treatment that comes with it), big house/car/private jet/luxury cruiser, branded stuff and the fancy holidays. If that's not worst case scenario enough, pa and ma might even want to severe ties with you or get a heart attack from your 'unfilial piety'. And let's say this sweet boy happens to be a farmer, you might even end up being Mrs. McDonald feeding pigs, rearing ducks or scooping horse poop. But as long as you're with the one you love and he's true to you, who cares? (I think)

Either way, to be truly happy with what you want, you cannot escape from making BIG sacrifices.

Howsoever, life is not a dead end as it seems. Sometimes, we should not be blinded by the circumstances right in front of us and make judgements so easily. There're stories of the rich who fall because of their foolishness and have their families exile them and the poor who rise from the slums and are now living happily and comfortably with the ones they love. Likewise, not all rich guys are bastards and not all poor guys are out there to drag you down with them. It could very well be the opposite too.

Generally, most people are not comfortable at making this kind of gamble, because they want what is in front of them and instant gratification.

I believe life is about making the decision which is right for you at that moment and not the perfect decision (because there is no such thing). The economy changes, what more people? It is more fulfilling to live based on your personal principles and not by what the society's standard is. Don't aim for something just because the rest of the society is aiming for it.

You want love, go for it.
You want money, go for it.
You want love and money, go for it.
As long as you can afford to pay the price and not regret it even if the outcome does not end up what you wanted, go for it.

So Sleepy

Monday: Holiday! We had a tea party at our house. Pics to come when I finally get them uploaded. Did not go throw oranges into the river as intended.

Tuesday-Wednesday: Work.

Thursday: Went to a charity dinner where the princess of Perak was the guest of honour. She was so pretty, prettier than her pictures in the newspapers. Dresscode was formal blue and gold. I so regret not bringing my DSLR. It's sad because it's so huge for my dainty purse but it takes the most wondrous photos.

Friday: When I finally used my most precious, saved up holiday from work, we failed to go to Pangkor because Xian got KOed by cirit-birit that very morning (prolly punishment because we sneaked in and out the ballroom commodo style). *Ai Ling mengamuks because of the wasted sandwiches* *I depressed because we missed out taking the 'jumping on beach like a bunch of mad-asses' photos* So I RO-ed till 5 in the morning.

Saturday: I went to work, crammed into my brain the whole process of handling commercial loans from scratch, fetched my boss home, ate a sandwich and chocolate, sleep, wedding dinner (which had a really good selection of wedding singers unlike normally), RO-ed, killed an Angeling and Deviling within 3 minutes one after another relying on a drop of HP and SP left (*fus fus fus*) and blog because I have to.

Sunday: I'm off to KL for a day trip. Bleh I'd rather stay at home and sleep. Thank God I have books to last me through the journey. I shall hunt for an Arch Angeling when I come back.

Hell yeah I survived the 14th.

I knew I could. LOLx. It's just like any other day. See... I didn't die or anything (*fus fus fus*).

Terus maju!

Gloomy Afternoon

It's lunch period. I'm having the cramps. But my recent moodiness had nothing to do with PMS (maybe just a little). God, help me survive through this month of February! Waiting for my next pay to come in. Fufufu. This reminds me of the time I was working here in 06'. When I just tried to do things to fill up my time and mind and hope time will pass eventually leading to a 'better day' (God knows what the bleep I'm actually waiting for).

My biggest fear of life is boredom and absolute incompetence. I am always worrying what if I had nothing to do, nothing to think about and blah. Or else, what if I don't do my part to contribute to the society? I also dread the day God will hold me accountable on how well I lived my life; whether I was a good human and did live with dignity. I must admit that the accounts are rather messy right now. Someone tell me I'm worrying unnecessarily and I should just stop self pitying myself and start appreciating everything I have now.

Just a few silly minutes ago, I discovered a new sub category for our existing collections of 'Gurauan' (meaning 'Humour'/'Jokes') If anyone has followed Shin Chan obsessively, they would recollect hearing the Gurauan Itali (which utterly makes no sense except the fact that it involves spaghetti used in the most bizarre manner). So eventually, Xian and I came up with other versions of Gurauan (incl. Gurauan India, Gurauan Malaysia, Gurauan Jepun etc.)

So within this week, my mum came up with a few statements that would fall under the category of 'Gurauan Orang Kaya' (which would also later lead to the discovery of 'Gurauan Orang Miskin'). Simply put, if anyone who has followed the anime Ouran High School Host Club will automatically identify what falls within 'Gurauan Orang Kaya' ie. jokes that 'commoners' will not find flattering / indirectly offensive / making no sense at all, while at the same time highlight the extraordinariness of being rich.

From yesterday's example:-

Me: Mum, we have a matchmaking request from my high school friend. She has a female poodle the same breed as Larry*. Considering the fact that you are constantly showing signs of wanting to have grandchildren recently, it seems that the youngest among us siblings (mum calls Larry her 'son') is able to fulfil your wish. Btw, her name is Suki and is Larry's age. Since they're both poodles, I think it's a good idea to let them breed.

*If you haven't known, Larry is my mother's precious poodle that I think she loves more than me.

Mum: (muka totally uninterested) Aiya, Larry's a virgin you know... (I read her mind and I heard, "So cannot just simply offer his precious virginity to some commoner poodle and have his heirs to our family's empire.") What if we bred Larry and Husky? The puppy would be a Poo-sky / Poo-ky! (Gurauan Anjing, which is the current trend among the tai-tai's of our family who constantly like to brag about their dogs.)

Me: Mother, what a horrible and vulgar combination for a name. Even for some miraculous way they manage to mate (in consideration of their vast difference in size), I don't dare to imagine what monster will come out.

Me: Oh and Ryan's got a new puppy. I think it's a Shih Tzu. Her name is Kim Chee and is very cute and playful.

Mum: (muka air liur meleleh) Oh so then they can give birth to a Shih-Poo / Poo-Shih. *syiok sendiri*

Me: Why are you so excited to become in laws with Auntie Jennifer? Just now you just totally ignored my first suggestion. Why you pei si other people's dog's background, not good enough for your dog izit?

Mum: (more air liur meleleh dan ketawa perempuan tamak) Your pa's favourite conditions ma, "Chuk Mun Dui Chuk Mun".*

*(literally meaning Bamboo door facing Bamboo door, it says that the bride and groom's family must be of equal standing. The opposite version would be "Muk Mun Dui Muk Mun" (Wooden Door facing Wooden Door) Bamboo was considered to be more exquisite and expensive than wood, therefore rich people will often have bamboo made doors.)

...if it's applicable to the dog, how much more strict the conditions would be on me and my siblings.

There, one of the most recent Gurauan Orang Kaya. Not everyone will know how to appreciate it (because it happens often to our Shin Chan jokes). And if you feel that it amuses you, I would be inclined to submit a daily dose of the amusements of the rich people on occassion.

Coffee/Tea

I should save the coffee for emergencies, when I'm about to drop dead on my desk. It usually has to do with eating too much for lunch. It's so cold in the office that my hands have turned dead purple. We often keep the windows open but my Kai-ma prefers it locked in case any one of us 'falls' out (usually intentionally LoLx).

I pray to God that my sister gets a job or whatever. Our schedules clash so violently, it only makes room for more violence.

Today is the first working day of February.

Time does fly when you're busy with so many things. At first, I thought I would have this mini-celebration celebrating my first month of surviving work to encourage myself, but my first month went pretty smoothly on and I feel that working for the next few months should be okay.

I'm rather moody right now because I have been putting off sending my laptop to be fixed. I want to play RO asap. I want to revert to my life revolving work, food, video games/TV programmes and sleep. It is undeniably the safest and most comfortable way to live.


Often, I feel underappreciated and taken for granted. I feel like withdrawing myself from certain people out of bitterness and hopelessness so that they would just realize how much have I been contributing to their lives. With good intentions, I consciously try to influence people into improving themselves and breaking through their comfort zones. Right now I’m subjected to believe that maybe I should be just thinking about my own wellbeing and improvements.


I should make it a habit to concentrate when I am drinking. I have been choking a lot on my drinks recently. It usually happens like this; I'm sipping something and my brain starts drifting towards some random thought and when I happen to snap back into reality in the course of drinking, I choke on whatever I'm drinking.

Went up to Cameron Highlands last Saturday with family and cousins.